Sunday, June 24, 2007

Gone Fishin'

I'm on vacation, so lists will be sporadic for the next week. If you start feeling any withdrawal effects, go back and read some past posts you might have missed. They're all $$$, yo. Seacrest out.

Saturday, June 23, 2007

Classic Commercial of The Day

Sort of

25 Greatest Action Movies of All Time

From Entertainment Weekly.

25. The Incredibles
24. Lethal Weapon

23. Drunken Master II

22. Predator

21. Spider-Man 2

20. Kill Bill, Vol. 1

19. Goldfinger

18. The Adventures of Robin Hood

17. The Bourne Supremacy

16. Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon

15. Enter The Dragon

14. Robocop

13. The Wild Bunch

12. The Empire Strikes Back

11. Speed

10. Terminator II: Judgment Day

9. Hard-Boiled

8. Saving Private Ryan

7. Gladiator

6. The Seven Samurai

5. The Matrix

4. The Road Warrior

3. Raiders of The Lost Ark

2. Aliens

1. Die Hard

They got it mostly right, but what about Braveheart? The Warriors? Jaws? Ben-Hur? Back To The Future? All better picks than Predator or Lethal Weapon.

Friday, June 22, 2007

"Pwn3d" Pic of the Day

"Pwn3d" (or "pwned"/"own3d") is internet geek for "owned," as in "you got served." (Click the words in yellow to link to the Wikipedia entry, if you really need more info.)

The Seven Wonders of the Natural World

I told you there were more Seven Wonders lists.

Be sure to click each thumbnail pic - most of them link to very cool larger pics.

1. The Grand Canyon (U.S.)

277 miles long, up to 18 feet wide, over a mile deep. Took six million years to create, so Joan Rivers was just an infant when it began (now click here quickly).

2. The Great Barrier Reef (Australia)

World's largest coral reef system, composed of about 3,000 individual reefs and 900 islands that stretch for 1,616 miles and cover an area of approximately 133,000 square miles. Can be seen from space.

3. Rio de Janiero Harbor (Brazil)

Stretches 20 miles inland from the sea, and early settlers thought it was a river, hence the city's name: Rio de Janiero means "river of January," for the month the harbor was discovered.

4. Mount Everest (Nepal)

At 29,029 feet, the world's tallest mountain. Over 2,000 people have climbed Everest, and 203 have died there. A permit from the Nepalese government to climb Everest can cost as much as $25,000 per person. "I paid 25K to climb Mt. Everest and all I got was this lousy death!"

5. Northern Lights (various countries)

AKA aurora borealis, the Lights are an electrostatic phenomenon characterized by a bright glow and caused by the collision of charged particles in the magnetosphere with atoms in the Earth's upper atmosphere. Whatever the #$%*@ that means. The Southern hemisphere has a similar phenomenon called aurora australis.

6. Victoria Falls (Zimbabwe and Zambia, Africa)

Called the largest waterfall on Earth (though some disagree). A mile wide and 360 feet tall, more than twice the height of Niagara Falls.

Parícutin Volcano (Mexico)

Parícutin first appeared in 1943. That's not a typo. Says Wikipedia: "It began as a fissure in a cornfield owned by farmer Dionisio Pulido on February 20, 1943. Pulido, his wife, and son all witnessed the initial eruption of ash and stones first-hand as they plowed the field. Much of the volcano's growth occurred during its first year, when it reached over 1,100 feet in height. For the next eight years the volcano would continue erupting, until Parícutin went quiet in 1952, attaining a final height of 1,391 feet above the cornfield from which it was born (total elevation 10,400 ft). The volcano has been quiet since. Like most cinder cones, Parícutin is a monogenetic volcano, which means that it will never erupt again."

Classic Comedy Clip of The Day

Triumph The Insult Dog at the premiere of one of the Star Wars movies. 99% of you have seen this, but to the 1% who haven't, you're in for a treat.

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Helpful Hint of the Day

If you are leaving town and want to suspend mail delivery until you return, save yourself a trip to the post office to fill out a form. Requests can be made online at:

Because I care about you.

Two Cool Who Videos

Two great videos of one of my favorite bands, The Who.

We knew John Entwistle was good on bass, but holy crap. An isolated cam on him performing "Won't Get Fooled Again" in concert. Be patient - takes a second to get going. Thanks, Seth, for the link.

A very young Who lip-syncs "Pinball Wizard" on the "This Is Tom Jones" variety show (!) in 1969.

The Seven Wonders of the World

You've heard of them, but do you know what they are?

There are actually several different "seven wonders" lists, but the first and most commonly referenced is The Seven Wonders of the Ancient World. The list was compiled around 140 BC by Greek poet Antipater. Only one of the list's seven "wonders" still exists today.

1. The Great Pyramid at Giza

(click the pic to see how big this mo-fo really is)

The oldest and largest of the three pyramids at Giza (Cairo), Egypt, built around 2500 BC. Originally 481 feet tall -- almost as tall as the Washington Monument -- and 570,000 square feet at its base. Took 20 years to construct. The only one of the Seven Wonders that still stands today.

2. The Hanging Gardens of Babylon (and the Walls of Babylon)

Built around 600 BC in present-day Iraq. The walls were 56 miles in total length, 80 feet deep and 320 feet high. Destroyed by earthquake in the first century BC, but no big loss because they were overrun by kudzu by then, anyway.

3. Temple of Artemis at Ephesus

Built over a 120-year period at Ephesus (modern-day Turkey), completed in 550 BC. Built to honor the Greek goddess Artemis (not to be confused with Aramis). Said to be nearly 400 feet in length and 180 feet wide, three times the size of the Parthenon. Destroyed by arson in 356 BC by fame-seeker Herostratus, who was promptly executed.

4. Statue of Zeus at Olympia

Built by Greeks in 435 BC. Forty feet tall, and carved in wood and ivory, plated in gold leaf, and inlaid with precious stones. Destroyed by fire in the 400-500 AD.

5. Tomb of Maussollos

(scale model)

Built by the Greeks and Persians at Halicarnassus (present-day Turkey) around 350 BC as a tomb for Persian governor Mausollos and his family. Nearly 135 feet tall, it was destroyed by earthquake in 1494. Has inspired the design of many modern-day buildings, including Grant's Tomb in New York City.

6. The Colossus of Rhodes

A huge statue of the Greek god Helios, built between 292 and 280 BC on the Greek island of Rhodes. One hundred feet tall, nearly the height of the Statue of Liberty. Stood only 60 years before being toppled by an earthquake in 224 BC.

7. Lighthouse of Alexandria

Built by Egyptians in the 3rd century BC on the island of Pharos at Alexandria (now a peninsula). At 385-450 feet tall, it was one of the tallest man-made structures in the world for centuries before being destroyed by two earthquakes in the early 1300s. Now we know what the L.A. City Hall was modeled after.

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Real Names of Famous Musicians

Thanks, Spinderfella, for the idea and THIS LINK, where you can find more names.

Akon - Aliaune Damala Bouga Time Puru Nacka Lu Lu Lu Badara Akon Thiam
Adam Ant - Stuart Goddard
Erykah Badu - Erica Wright
Pat Benatar - Patricia Andrejewski
Tony Bennett - Anthony Benedetto
Bono - Paul Hewson
David Bowie - David Jones
50 Cent - Curtis Jackson
Patsy Cline - Virginia Hensley
Alice Cooper - Vincent Furnier
Ice Cube - Oshea Jackson
Taylor Dayne - Leslie Wonderman
Mos Def - Dante Smith
Snoop Dogg - Cordazer Calvin Broadus
Thomas Dolby- Thomas Robertson
Sheena Easton - Sheena Orr
The Edge - David Evans
Enya - Eithne Ni Braona
Flavor Flav - William Jonathan Drayton Jr.
Macy Gray - Natalie McIntyre
Boy George - George O'Dowd
MC Hammer - Stanley Burrel
Engelbert Humperdinck - Arnold Dorsey
Head (Korn) - Brian Welch
Billy Idol - William Broad
Rick James - James Johnson, Jr.
Wynonna Judd - Christina Ciminella
Joan Jett - Joan Marie Larkin
Alicia Keys - Alicia Cook
Chaka Khan - Carole Stevens
LL Cool J - James Smith
Queen Latifah - Dana Owens
Huey Lewis - Hugh Cregg<> - Barry Pincus
Marilyn Manson - Brian Warner
Meat Loaf - Marvin Aday
Freddie Mercury - Farrokh Bulsara
George Michael - Yorgos Panayiotou
Joni Mitchell - Roberta Anderson
Nelly - Carnell Haynes, Jr.
Ric Ocasek - Richard Otcasek
Johnny Paycheck - Don Lytle
Pepa (Salt-N-Pepa) - Sandra Denton
Pink - Alecia Moore
Iggy Pop - James Osterberg, Jr.
Dee Dee Ramone - Douglas Colvin
Joey Ramone - Jeffery Hyman
Johnny Ramone - John Cummings
Lou Reed - Louis Firbank
Busta Rhymes - Trevor Smith
Henry Rollins - Henry Garfield
Axl Rose - William Rose Jr.
Ja Rule - Jeffery Atkins
Sade - Helen Folasade Adu
Seal - Henry Olusegun Olumide Samuel
Gene Simmons - Chaim Witz
Sisqo - Mark Andrews
Nikki Sixx - Franklin Feranna
Grace Slick - Grace Wing
Fatboy Slim - Quentin Cook
Paul Stanley - Stanley Eisen
Joss Stone - Joscelyn Stocker
Donna Summer - LaDonna Gaines
Timbaland - Timothy Z. Mosley
Tina Turner - Anna Mae Bullock
Shania Twain - Eileen Edwards
Steven Tyler - Steven Tallarico
Eddie Vedder - Edward Severson III
Sid Vicious - John Ritchie
Jack White - John Anthony Gillis
Peter Wolf - Peter Blankfield
Stevie Wonder - Steveland Judkins
Lil Bow Wow - Shad Moss
Rob Zombie - Robert Cummings

Groovy 70s Commercial of the Day

I remember this like it was yesterday.

"Hey good lookin', we'll be back to pick you up later!"

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Double Dork of the Day

The Tourist of Death

It all started with a photo.

This chilling picture turned up in the days following 9/11, and reportedly came from a camera found in the rubble of the World Trade Center. Was it really possible that someone managed to photograph one of the hijacked planes mere milliseconds before impact? And if so, what became of the unknown man in the photo, and the person(s) who took it?

The photo turned out to be a hoax, of course, and most people dismissed it as such. But, a few believers remained, and their numbers grew as more photos of the same mysterious man at other disasters began to surface. More and more people became convinced that this man was not some innocent sightseer in the wrong place at the wrong time, but something much more nefarious: a time-traveling harbinger of doom -- a Tourist of Death, if you will -- inexplicably present at every great disaster of the millennium, a witness to our suffering and mocker of our powerlessness to stop it.

The pictures you are about to see seem to support this theory. Are they
real, or are they so much hooey? Decide for yourself.

Pearl Harbor (1941)

JFK assassination (1963)

LBJ sworn in after JFK assassination (1963)

Lee Harvey Oswald shot by Jack Ruby (1963)

Sinking of the Titanic (1912)

Mt. St. Helens eruption (1980)

Assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand, cause of World War I (1914)

Atomic bombing of Hiroshima (1945)

Attempted assassination of Ronald Reagan (1981)

Munich Olympics (1972)

Hindenburg disaster(1937)

Lincoln assassination (1865)

Watergate scandal/Nixon resignation (1974)

Oklahoma City bombing (1995)

Julius Caesar assassination (44 BC)

Orleans "Waking & Dreaming" LP (1976)

Columbine High School massacre (1999)

Loch Ness Monster appearance (1955)

Challenger disaster (1986)

Custer's Last Stand (1876)

Kent State shootings (1970)

Janet Jackson "wardrobe malfunction" (2004)

Godzilla attacks Tokyo (1965)

Battle of Gettysburg (1863)

Steve Bartman blows Cubs' shot at the World Series (2003)

Monday, June 18, 2007

Classic TV Show Open of The Day

Man I loved this show as a kid.

Hey - I just thought of a new euphemism for masturbation. "My mom caught me revving up the powerful Mach 5 last night."

Sunday, June 17, 2007

Worst Celebrity Dads

The top 10 worst celebrity dads, from Maxim magazine.

10. David Hass--burp--selhoff

The Hoff, he like the drinky. What kind of jackass asks his kid to videotape him the next time he gets snockered?

9. Rick Hilton

Real nice job on Paris, guy. She's only a spoiled, brain-dead, exhibitionistic racist druggy jailbird. Did she call you crying from the pokey today?

8. Ozzy Osbourne

Two kids, two rehab bills. I guess those "just say no" messages just aren't that credible coming from a guy who said he once took acid every day for a full year.

7. Father Oliver O'Grady

While not technically a father, this scumbag should be #1 on the list. Abused so many children (25), they made a movie about him ("Deliver Us From Evil"). Here's hoping he'll be delivered to a special place in Hell for people who use religion to take advantage of others.

6. Michael Lohan

See Rick Hilton.

And he looks like such a nice guy.

5. Alec Baldwin

Phone fan. I bet his phone doesn't ring at all this Father's Day.

4. Joe Simpson

We're allowed to talk about Jessica's funbags. You aren't. Creep.

3. Darth Vader

Absentee father. Doesn't even meet his son until the kid is grown, and what's the first thing he does? Lops off the boy's hand! Nice.

2. Scott Peterson

Not technically a father, because he murdered his son in utero. Jeez, fucko, at least try it before you hate it. Not to be hateful, but I hope this oxygen- thief's rectum is the busiest corridor at San Quentin.

1. Michael Jackson

Kiddie-fiddler who dangled his own child out a hotel window. You're bad all right, Mikey. Really really bad.


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